"lost my phone :("

Ever since I blogged about losing my mobile phone about 25 people have emailed personally (mainly for India) asking me if I can help them find their phone or block it (no, I'm not joking). Clearly they think my personal website gives the impression that I am able to do this. Either that or they're neither reading nor looking at what this site offers. Right, so I just received this:

Hi ,
     I was at yoga yesterday at the lochend community center in edinburgh with  
my friend samantha,my friends mum doreen and her son and 2 cleaners.Before yoga 
i had put my phone next to my friends phone on top of a cupboard.Ater yoga i 
took my phone and put it in my pocket,me and my friend and my friends mum's son 
all went through int oa little room and played hide and seek in the dark.A 
little while later about 20 mins i realized that my phone was not in my pocket 
:(. i only got it for christmas this year :O

Everyone looked high and low but couldn't find it.
What shall i do ?
Can you replace it with a new one?

Email me back on Dancingdizzy13@aol.com

Please hurry !!!! x

So, if anybody has seen a mobile somewhere in the Scotland area that belongs to Dancingdizzy13 then let me know. Perhaps I can replace it.

UPDATE

You'd think by writing this it'd put off people from contacting me about lost mobile phones but this arrived a few seconds ago:

my mobile phone NOKIA N73 was stolen.how to find my mobile phone?please help me
Imeino:353641013194935
Name:Yuvraj.D.Sisodiya
Contact no:09879531575,09725041575
  i am live in india(gujarat)  pls sent me your mobile no.pls quickly your email.

UPDATE 2

It doesn't stop. Today's harvest of stupidity:

Subject: my nokia mobile 2310 thefted

Name:p. vishnu vardhan babu
adress:6-8-9,ravindranagar,nalgonda,a.p,india.
mobile no:9966519774
IMEI NO.:355532010272527
missed date:22/2/08
model:2310 nokia