Alone In The Snow

I have been hiding here
For 3 months
I am alone, and Rot's been silent for once
But I am so afraid
I'm terrified
Of what the fuck the trunk of my car might hide
I have been hiding here
Alone in the snow
What other place does a murderer go?
Did I do it? I will never know
Until I come to terms with what we have done, but I won't

I'll let it kill me slow cause
I don't want to be the one to blame
I'd never kill her - then I see it again
It's a vision etched into the side of my brain
I really loved her, I can't bear this pain, no

HELP ME

What are you if you kill the only thing you love?
Is this pain something I will one day get rid of?
I think I always knew that I would fuck this up
I am a failure
I don't deserve love

I don't want to be the one to blame
But I see it again and again and again
I can't believe the monster I became
I really loved her, I can't bear this pain

My fate will be the same
I'll find a rope and pull my spine from my brain
My fate will be the same
I want the last sound I hear to be the snap of my neck and it's over

FUCK
I have been hiding here
For 3 months
A cabin in the snow in silence for once, but
I'll never shake it
That screaming thought
I'll never feel her lips again
It's all my fault
I plan on dying here
Hell waits below
What other place does a murderer go?
I think I did it, I don't want to know
I don't want to know
And I will never fucking know

What are you if you kill the only thing you love?
Is this pain something I will one day get rid of?
I think I always knew that I would fuck this up
I am a failure
I don't deserve love

As I step up to the chair
I start to see some clarity here
I am my biggest source of pain
And it's a pain I can not bear
The rope fits tightly around my neck
What's in the trunk? Fuck, should I check?
Every time I close my eyes
I see me break her fucking neck

I know that I am the one to blame
Will anyone even remember my name?
I take step forward and fucking end the pain
I am Tom, but Rot is my shame