I Bought You a Singing Toilet

Before you were born I bought you a singing toilet
It makes funny stupid little songs when you take a poo
Before you were born I bought you a singing toilet
The guy at the store didn't really know what to do when I asked
If it played Nickelback songs when you poo

The blankest stare, just like headlights on a deer
He stood right there for what seemed like a million years
Did I seem too excited? I did my best to hide it
I said I'm gonna be a dad soon
If you're gonna be my son you're gonna learn how to take a poo

Before you were born I bought you a singing toilet
I only used it once or twice to make sure that it worked
The day you were born, your mom passed out pretty hard
She was pushing all through the night and I could tell that it hurt pretty bad
But there's no time to be sad, we gotta learn to poo

The blankest stare (???)
The blankest stare (???) you, me, and the nurse
The blankest stare, I'm not here, I'm your dad
Let's get ready, go take a poo

Before you were born I bought you a singing toilet
Before you were born I bought you a singing toilet
Before you were born I bought you a singing toilet
Before you were born I bought you a singing toilet
So you can poop, you can poop just like your dad
So you can poop just like your dad
So you can poop just like your dad
So you can poop just like your dad
Poop just like, poop just like, poop just like your dad
Poop just like, poop just like, poop just like your dad
On a singing toilet
You can poop just like your dad
On a singing toilet
You can poop just like your dad
On a singing toilet