Parental Advisory On My Ass

[Spoken Word]
- Okay guys, so here's the deal
Okay? We gotta sell a BILLION copies
Or else we're gonna go fucking bankrupt

~ What the fuck? No not bankrupt
I have a billion children and I have to feed them all $1 each

- I know, I know
Your children are on a very strict dollar diet
You fucking idiot
But it's okay
Because I got a plan

* Okay but like the last time that you had that exact same voice
In that exact same manner
And you were also the middle channel
You had the worst idea in the fucking world
And then my grandma died

- Well yeah okay asshole
That may be true right level me
But uh actually this is the best idea in the fucking universe
And listen to me it's gonna be great
So what we gotta do
Is that we got to get Martin Cabello III on the record

~ Okay but who the FUCK is Martin Cabello?

* And why is there three of 'em?

- Okay right channel way to be a fucking racist
Asshole
Homophobe
Piece of shit
But actually Martin Cabello
Y'know you remember the th- th-
Cocaina guy
He's the- the- the funniest man in universe actually
I- uh- I actually learned from him on top of a mountain
Eighteen years ago when I was um... three?
How old was I... w- eighteen years ago?
I don't fuckin' remember
Anyways so
Um
Uh we're gonna get him on the record
And uh he's gonna do a thing

~ Okay yeah that's nice and all
But I literally just got off the phone with Martin Cabello III
And uh he actually said you can uh die a painful death
Alone
Uh 'cause he doesn't like you
You little bitch!

- *sigh* Wow, okay
Good ol' Cabello, Gabello, Badello
Always being a funny fucker
Okay, fine, I guess we're gonna have to go with Plan B
'Cause you see I actually planned for this
'Cause I have actually-
When I was doing the training with Martin Cabello I was also studying his voice
And how he talks
So I actually have an impeccable impression of Martin Cabello
So we can just do that and we can pose as Martin Cabello
And uh I th- I- I- think that will work

* Wait isn't that a little fucking illegal though?
Like I think that's like identity theft

- Pfft, "Identity Theft, Bispendity Breff"
And "Bitty bitty itty titty breast"
I don't give a FUCK
Okay? So watch
Watch and I'm gonna do it
Okay are you ready?

*Ahem*

*Terrible Martin Cabello III impression*
Hello everyone!
Martin Cabello here
And uh I would like you to know that The Short Week is gonna be releasing July 26th
So you better buy the album
Or else I will uhh
Or else uhh
"You're fucking dead"
*Sanctuary Guardian from Earthbound*
See that's the quote that I said because I'm Martin Cabello III
Ha, ha, yeah, I totally uh am Martin Cabello
And you can also go to my Cameo page
At www.bandcamp.com/raemills
That's not even a right Bandcamp link
I think "raemills" comes before the .bandcamp
I don't fucking know
But anyways
Uh Cocaina
Somebody asked why I hate the Military
Woah! I'm out

So what do y'all think?

Wow, Nagato Kamado, that was so cool... can you do it again?

Bruh